1. do not consult the train, bus, or tube map before leaving hostel for a city you don't know the actual location of.
2.ignore the advice of steve, a dishy kiwi who has just moved to london and tells you the exact rail station to be at. say to yourself, 'i don't think steve really knows. we will go another way, because i, in my infinite knowledge must be better siuted to getting us there quicker.'
3. ask a tube empolyee where the nearest train station is. not the one that will take you to your destination...no, the nearest one. then proceed to take the tube that leads you there.
4. get out of the tube, knowing that you are in the wrong place. ask a random construction dude on the street where you can locate the correct tube station. DO NOT LISTEN when he tells you that you are most deffinately in the wrong area of town. now, this next step is crucial, DO NOT under any circumstances get back on the tube. CHOOSE TO GO BY FOOT!!!
5. ok, so now your well into having no clue where you are. you will start to notice a change in the atmosphere, a change for the worse. you start heading into the bad part of town. and i don't mean, 'don't use the bathroom here cause it's probably not clean' i mean 'keep an eye out becuase there's probably someone wating around the corner to jump you so they can harvest your organs and sell them on the black market'
6. now, just keep walking, thinking that you will eventually just magically figure out where you are. you start asking random public officials where your station is. they don't know, becuase they never take it. it's that far away. for extra fun you can have a 40 lb. pack on your back this whole time, plus a daypack and a huge water bottle clanging against your leg.
7.continue on your journey. do not take a bus, to not take a tube. just keep walking. keep walking until you have such a forlorn look on your face that a random woman on the street will stop you and ask you if you need help.
and that is the end. a pretty good, self tested method for getting lost in the middle of london. after that, we did start to find our way, so if you want to get more lost than that, you're going to have to find another research source.
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7 comments:
we are forever grateful for your advice in the future.
and most importantly...
NEVER FORGET THE DISHY KIWI!
haha amazing. 1. i'm glad you finally got lost! took you long enough! 2. But i am not happy that you got lost in the bad part of london 3. but since you are safe and sound, i can rejoice in your wanderings! I miss you like bread misses butter.
Becky cooper. i love you, and miss you. its weird to think about how far away you are, and how different the time is. Sounds like youre having a great time though! Im happy for you. I betting getting lost is pretty exciting though huh...how boring would it be if you never got lost. haha :)
Quaint! Simply quaint! I bet you are having the quaintest time there. Making memories.... a few interesting ones already... thats for sure.
Okay its Friday night and I have a story for you and Sue... and apparently pretty much for whoever else is reading this:
Marty's Brother and sister-in-law are visitng from New Jersy and have been here for a few days. They are doing an Alaskan cruise tomorrow morning. Anywho, their bags got lost.
So there I am, at the airport on the Friday of Memorial Day Weekend at like midnight... getting suitcases becuase I was keeping Salem company with his mom and brad. (and who knows why HE had to go....) And I find myself asking myself "why the heck am i here!?"
Anyway, We finally FIGHT our way to the arrivals and im half asleep in the back of the suburban with a acceptionally full bladder, and someones BANING ON THE DOOR! IT WAS STORY!
oh man. You should have seen the look on Salem's face. I'm sure you can imagine.
But there were minor details that have occured all throughout the last few days of how this has all been a cover up of a "lost luggage" story (no pun intended)
So... youre welcome, Becky for wasting your Europe time reading a story that I would have told you anyway one of these days. But hey, that's neither here nor there.
Oh, also... 16ozdripinaventicup feller came in today. Usually, as you know, my reaction would have been negative. But I love him so dearly. Sue and I caught ourselves chuckling as we watched him babble on to us about God knows what. The reason being is that he just makes us think of you and how much we miss you.
How does it feel that out of all elements of home, THAT'S who reminds us of you. hahaha
lots of love -e
Thank you for calling me to fill me in on this story, which I found quite hilarious, but could happen to ANYONE in that blasted city...tubes everywhere I tell you! AND EVERYTHING is a "ten minute walk" to Londoners...have you run accross that phrasology? If you haven't, count yourself blessed because it can be quite ingratiating (by yours and my definition of ingratiating, of course...which is better than Webster's anyday of the week, but especially on Saturdays) when you've been lost and walking for hours, and EVERYONE you ask for helpful info points you in a GENERAL direction, smiles, and says..."it's about a ten minute walk" three hours later, having gone EVER GENERAL DIRECTION...you get the picture...apparently you have tasted the ghetto of London because of it, for that I am sorry...don't make me come over there and pull out my "9!"
OK, on a more serious note...you need to call this number: 888-373-2896 and talk to Michael (or I think anyone who answers might be ok). He is from Simpson CU, and they think your Visa card is being "frauded" if that is a word! haha...I think not, perhaps. Anyway, since it is being used in a foreign country, they are concerned and they need to hear from YOU, because none of us are on the acct, so they won't take our word for it. We told them that you were traveling, but they are going to close the visa acct if they don't hear from you. SO, all that said to say...you need to call your visa card peeps cause otherwise your gonna have an issue on your hands.
OK, I love you so so so much and I miss you SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO much. Talk to you soon!
the number Elisabeth gave you to call is right, but its not for the credit union, it's for some visa office somewhere(at least they speak discernable english--a real blessing these days!). anyway the credit union number is 426-9701. Maybe some of your simpson crowd can help out their favorite barrista (sorry Erin & Sue--but you know it's true).well, hope this helps you out, keep in mind tomorrow, Mon. is a holiday here, so they won't be open. Was glad to hear your voice when you called. I miss you lotsssssssssssssss! Mizi is of course in deep depression (close to the 'depths of despair' I believe)with his "sibling" away. Sorry to hear you were lost in the really BAD part of town. Being the mother that I am, it's best that I found out after the fact whcn you were safe. Next time if you're going to get lost, do it in the good part of town, okay? But it does sound like its been a great trip so far. Definitely worth waiting for for all those years. Just think, France & Italy still to come. Have an espresso and pastry for me. luv you lots, mom
everything in London is a 10 min walk!!! it makes me happy that you got lost too, is that bad?
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